Brighton Rock

What lovely, big muscles you’ve got. Erm, thank you. Carl’s wife looks on, irritated by their mortgage broker’s comment. Sorry, could we return to the, she says while pointing at the contract on the table, this thing here. Oh sorry darlin’, their mortgage broker replies, you’re looking good too. Katy shuffles about on her chair trying to stifle a smile. Their broker taps away at her keyboard. The chewing gum in her mouth, as her teeth clash together rapidly, produces a wet, smushy noise. I tell you what, she says, I’ve got just the mortgage for you. She swivels the computer screen, but in a way that prevents Katy from seeing the figures. It’s big, long and affordable Carl, she says, just like your arms. Their broker gives him a slow, pronounced wink and mouths the word, cheeky, at him. He isn’t sure how to respond and so he nods and replies, indeed. Katy hisses involuntarily, leans over, with both hands on Carl’s shoulder, and squints at the screen. Lucky girl, their broker says, shaking her head. Katy says, yeah, while trying to focus on the figures in front of her. Carl nods in agreement. They both take a moment to work out the maths in their heads. Carl counts his fingers under the desk. Katy whispers her seven times tables. Oh go on then, their broker says, breaking the silence. She springs on to the desk, stretches her arm to meet Carl and squeezes his bicep. Oh no that’s not really necessary, he says while tensing on contact with her grip. Their broker breathes in deeply. Thought so, she says, like Brighton rock, but meatier. She shuffles gradually backwards towards her seat. Can we just, Katy says in an exasperated tone. Please. Can we just do the mortgage calculation? Please? God yeah, their broker replies. Numbers numbers numbers, she says. She winks at Carl again. He looks down at his fingers. We’re having fun right, guys? their broker says. Oh yeah, Carl replies, definitely. Katy scowls at him. I mean, no. I mean, erm, sorry, he blurts. No need to apologise with arms like that, their broker says. Oh come on, Katy mutters as she starts counting from the start again.